Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Raising Godly Men

Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it.

{Proverbs 22:6}

I'm the mom of a precious little boy. He's three, but he won't always be.

He won't always need me and he won't always be little. One day he's going to be a man {Heaven help me} and when that day comes, I pray with everything in me that he's a Godly one.

I want him to respect and value women. I want him to be a gentleman who understands that women are God's gift to men and they deserve to be respected, cherished, and honored. 

But if I want that for him when he's 25, it has to start now. In our home.

We were at the park with this sweet girl a couple days ago and he started pushing her around and that's when God began speaking to me about this. Because yes, he's three and he'll never remember this moment. But I will. Because she wanted him to push her around, and he did it for her. At three, that's him being a gentleman. I want this to continue his entire life. I want him to be the leader, to serve, to cherish.

I can't allow him to think it's okay to push a little girl down at the park, because when he gets older he'll think it's okay to push down a women when he doesn't get his way. 

We have an epidemic of husbands and fathers who think it's okay to walk out on women, to hit them, to talk down to them.

Ultimately it's his choice, no matter how much I teach him. But I can promise this, if we don't teach our sons to respect women, no one will. Because Godly men don't just happen. They are a product of our persistence, our courage, and our diligence. 

Make no mistake about it, Jesus valued women. 

In a time where women didn't feel like they had much value, Jesus reached out and cherished them. He gave them value. 

In Matthew 28, Jesus revealed that He was alive first to two women. Not men. Women. In John 4 a Samaritan woman came to the well where Jesus was to get a drink. She was an outcast in her community, she had five previous husbands and was living with a sixth man that she wasn't married to. She was looked at as immoral and Jesus spoke to her. Jesus offered her salvation. Jesus gave her value. {This is a beautiful post I found about that story. I highly recommend reading it.} 

While we're affirming the value of ladies, we also have to remember to affirm our son's worth as well. He has to know the depths of Christ' love for him. He can't give Christ' unconditional love to others if he hasn't received it or seen it. They have to be told they are righteous in Christ, that He loves them no matter what, that there is purpose on their life. They have to know that they are sons of the King and that alone gives them worth that no one can ever add to or take away. We must instill value into our children, so they can instill value into others.

Actions speak louder than words. We can tell our children something over and over, but they learn immensely more from what we do. What we believe is shown through how we act.

Dad, what are you teaching your son? Because if you walk out on his mom, you teach him it's okay to walk out on whoever he wants. If you hit his mom, you teach him it's okay to hit women. If you commit adultery, you're telling him that's okay, too. 

Single parents, this used to scare me. But He gives so much more grace {James 4:6}. Your son can see all the bad in the world and God can still come in and bridge the gap. Because if he doesn't have a Godly earthly father, He sure has the perfect Daddy in heaven. Jesus puts the lonely in families {Psalm 68:6} and is a Father to the fatherless {Psalm 68:5; Psalm 10:14; Psalm 146:9}. If God allowed you to be that child's mom, all by yourself, He has equipped you to lead that little boy. 

For us, that means Lincoln opens my door and lets me walk through first. It means he calls me beautiful and he calls his baby cousin beautiful. It means he uses his words, and not his fists. It means helping me, it means serving, and it means loving. 

So moms and dads, pray for your sons. Pray with them. Read the Bible with them. Teach them their worth. Show them where Jesus affirmed women's value. Love his mom. Serve his mom. Protect his mom. Lead with your words and then lead by example.

May we be warriors for our sons. May we never slack on teaching our sons all that God has and wants for them. 

Because I don't want a son who just attends of church. I want to watch Lincoln become a mighty man of God, and that starts at home. 


  1. Wow! Wonderful, wonderful post. I couldn't agree more --- in order for our sons to grow up to be a godly man, we must start at home when they are young. My mom did an outstanding job teaching my brothers how to treat women, and now that they're both grown and one is's beautiful to see them treating women as special in a world that wants to tell them that women aren't any different than men. Great post --- I really liked it!

  2. How true every word you've typed is! I've got two little men (1.5 and 2.5) and I'm blessed they have a wonderful daddy to model what a Godly man behaves like. But I have a job as well-that is modeling a Godly woman who respects herself as God's creation. Praying for our boys needs to start now!

  3. This is beautiful. Oh my goodness your words in this post spoke to so many momma's out there and I am so thankful to have read this! I think you are absolutely right and know you are doing such a wonderful job in raising Lincoln, he is so blessed to have a mom like you!