Thursday, January 31, 2013

Why Do I Fear?

I'm usually an incredibly joyful person. I love life and I'm almost always happy. But I do have my days. My life is not perfect by any means, and I have meltdowns just like the rest of the world. Tonight was a bad night. I was anxious about mine and Lincoln's future and had a meltdown.. a HUGE meltdown. God led me to look at the pictures of me and Linc in the hospital. So I did. And then it hit me.. Why do I have fear about the future? I began to think about all the things that God has brought me through, all the things He delivered me from and began wondering.. Why in the heck am I so anxious? If God can get me through all of that, can't He get me through all of this?? So in my head I began listing all the incredible things that God has gotten me through since I became pregnant with Lincoln. God held me through a heartbreak, and put my shattered heart back together. He held me as I sat on a couch and told my parents that I was going to be having a baby. He taught me to be a mom at 17. He gave me strength to finish high school while I was sleeping about four hours a night, while raising my newborn son. God provided me a job to provide for my son. He got me through starting college, and has gotten me through full time school. He taught me to stand up for myself, as well as to stand up for the precious miracle He entrusted to me. And He gives me courage to be a single mom.

If God did all that how much so will He handle the rest of my days on earth? Why am I anxious when I have seen firsthand how He can work in difficult situations?! He is sovereign! He knows what He's doing! And He's got awesome plans! So tonight, instead of being anxious, I'm going to rest in the unchanging grace of my Jesus! And know that He is good, and everything He does is good!

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

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